Can you be nervous and calm at the same time…

63ec46600385c0c55005e44720cfaeb7-open-adoption-birth-mother-300x300Oh boy….so tomorrow is a BIG day for us! Tomorrow afternoon we meet the birth mom who really liked our profile book. I think we are a mixed bag of emotions but every time I think about it I feel calmer than I think that I should. I feel like I’m supposed to be all mixed up and freaking out, but I’m not.

I’ve been drawn to this birth mom since October and I’ve only known here form a paragraph in an email update from the agency but when I think about her I pray for her and I feel God around me keeping me calm. I have no idea what will happen tomorrow or how we will feel or how she is feeling but I’m praying that she feels the same calmness that I do and I hope she can feel the prayers we are all saying for her and the decision she will be making.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m nervous — kinda like a blind date sort of nervous — she only knows us from a book and tomorrow we will get to ask each other questions about our families, what we see for this child, how we would raise them. I’m nervous that I won’t answer a question ‘right’, I’m nervous that I will forget to ask something and then think of it tomorrow night as I’m trying to go to bed. Nervous if we look better in the book vs in person 🙂 You know, all the crazy thoughts that run through my mind.

I am really looking forward to meeting her and seeing what she looks like. From what the Expectant Parent Advocate (EPA) has said she is a wonderful person, easy to talk to, easy to like, very open about everything and won’t shy away from questions. We have some questions from the EPA that she may ask us and we will be getting our list together tonight.

Thank you all for the continued prayers as we navigate this adventure! We know that God has a path already set for this little child and for the birth mom — she is an AMAZINGLY STRONG woman and I wish she knew how much we already love her and support her and pray for her.

Tomorrow at 3:15 we will be meeting her!! I can’t wait to update you on how everything went.

Matt.18.5

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One thought on “Can you be nervous and calm at the same time…

  1. Marianne- I did not know you had lost three! I’m so sorry you won’t through that. But I wanted you to know I am praying for you and your husband to be blessed with the right child. You are clearly a wonderful mom and you both deserve the happiness that you’ll receive from a second baby. Good luck- and prayers sent!

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